Have fun with this one.

What a bitch. This cunt threw out my buddy on the street and totally fucked him over, with like $500.00. He's way pissed. Will somebody help collaborate in getting some revenge?

[WalkaboutTigger]

There are all sorts of incredibly creative things you can do to this individual. To tailor it appropriately, give a few more details such as:

How long were they together?
Are they or were they married?
What reason did she give for throwing him out?
Does she have any of his property that he wants back?

Given the right circumstances, he could make Hell seem like Paradise compared with what her life is like now that he's pissed with her.

[cold]

Yeah... and I'm the buddy. Was with her for like a year. She got me booted out, and then wanted me to take her back the next day (???). Crazy bitch. Helped me out with some money for school and now she's got me by the balls. I though she'd be at least professional about this, but she has just lost it. I'm looking for some means to gather some assurance she won't fuck with me anymore. Can ya please help me out?

C o l d

[kenny]

You need to elaborate more.

[cold]

Well I was with her since... june 17th last year. We ran away together to Portland to see how things worked out... Turned out she had a huge jealousy problem with me having friends that were girls. She would take a great night and turn it into shit by manipulating my words and using them against me. We almost got married a couple of times. We were almost inseperatable. Everyday I was with this girl. Mainly because she thought all of my friends and family were out to get her, and it was up to me to proove that noone hated her.

- C o l d

[EDIT:Subtract] I removed information I felt that explained too much of who she might be. [/EDIT]

[cold]

So we had a fight while babysitting her dad's house. We got into an argument (go figure..) and I had to work the next morning. So I said "hey your being a jerk and I am going back to the apartment because I know I will get some sleep there." So I go home. Next I know it, she's bustin' in 10 minutes after me and starts throwing my shit all over the place.
"What are you doing here?" I say.
"You're moving out, and I am going to help you." She responds.
"What the fuck? What'n the hell for?"
She says nothing and continues to toss my belongings from the kitchen on the floor.
"Hey! Thats my coffee maker! Don't throw that, it could break!"
Not missing a beat, she says to herself "Hmm now what else is yours.. Oooh spices!" and continues to throw my spices and shit all over and continues into the bedroom. So I say:
"Hey, I asked you a couple of times. Now I'm telling you. Stop touching my shit! Let's talk about this!" So she goes for my electronics and tools etc. Her hand reaches in our closet and sweeps all my things onto the bedroom floor. This is where I made a mistake. I grabbed her (not too hard at all) by the arms and firmly spoke "Don't touch my shit! I mean it!" She rips away violently and screams "Don't you ever fucking touch me! I will call the cops on your ass!"
"Fine call the cops!" I respond. "I would love to see an officer experience what the hell you are doing to my property right now!" So she did.
"Hello 911?" Starts to turn on the water works... "Yes my EX-boyfriend is moving out. We are having a fight and he is grabbing me, giving me red marks on my arms. And I have a fat lip" 'the fuck? A fat lip? "and his dad is a police officer and I'm afraid you guys won't do anything about it" Now she's bringing my dad into this..?
Ok the cops come right... She tones down her story. (turns out she smacked her own lip when she ripped away from me.) Holy shit, if she hadn't I would've went to jail. (I was this close -><-). The cops ask if I have anywhere to go. I say yes. So they escorted me out. So I stayed with my bud that night.
Next day she wants to work things out. Being in such a state of shock I say "ok" because I still don't know exactly what had happened. We try to work things out, but I have a really bad feeling about the whole thing and decide to end the relationship. Now after she's done begging and pleading saying she'll never do it again (and again and again...), she says I have to sign a contract stating that I'll pay her back for a loan for school. This is where the "got me by the nuts" part comes in, and where I need some insurance, and some assurance that she won't fuck with me.. I appreciate the replies. Fuck I got a lot to say. What a bitch 'eh? So what do you guys say... do you think you can help me please?

- C o l d

[WalkaboutTigger]

The following information is provided as a gag only and is not a recommended course of action for any act of revenge. Should anyone choose to use the information is doing so at their own risk and holds me harmless.

1. Do not sign anything she might give you. PERIOD.

2. Do not contact her at all unless she has something of yours that is irreplaceable.

3. Wait 2 weeks to start the mayham.

4. Call her parents house and leave a message. Inform her that she needs to go to the clinic because you found out she's given you a special little friend and you know its from her since you haven't been with anyone else for the last year. Do this repeatedly over the course of a week.

5. If you have them, e-mail nude pictures of her to her parents from an anonymous account such as hotmail or other free e-mail - do not enter any real information when signing up for this account and do not sign up for it from your place of residence - go to a library or an Internet cafe to sign up and send the e-mails. Do this approximately 2 weeks after step 5 is complete.

6. If you know where she is staying, and there is a pay phone close by, call 911 from the pay phone and report there is a girl locked in her apartment threatening to end her life with a gun. Tell them she's been real loud for the last couple of minutes but its gotten all quiet all of a sudden. Do this at about 3 a.m. - wear gloves. Do this immediately following the 2-week cooling off period.

7. On a color printer, print a California license plate full sized. Tape over her license plate. Make sure it looks like it has 2002 tags. Do this approximately 1 week after step 5.

8. Wearing gloves, loosen the 4 bolts holding the rear license plate of her car. Only 1/2 turn of the bolts should be left in place when you are finished. Portland cops live to pull people over who don't have a license plate on the rear. Do this approximately 2 weeks after step 7.

9. If you know her telephone number, print up flyers reading "Get High Legally! Instructions for making LEGAL Extacy!" and affix her phone number. Post these, at night, around the local kid hang-outs, the middle schools and high schools in the area she lives in.

10. Take out 2 cash-paid-for ads in the local newspaper. Both ads should have her address but not her telephone number. One reads "Cheap Harley Davidson motorcycle parts" and lists various regularly expensive HD parts - mention in the ad the only time they can come to look at them is a specific date between 3 p.m. and 5 p.m. The second ad reads "For Sale - select-fire M16 with underbarrel grenade launcher - several cases of ammunition and grenades available as well - cheap - moving out of state" and mention it can also be looked at the same time and place as the first ad. When the Hell's Angels and the BATF show up at the same time to the same place, the fur will fly.

I hope this provides you some ideas.

[Acidprime]

in my basement for three weeks (rent free) with his girl and then left with out even calling my ass,even after I tried to get that punk a job.Just kidding man you can be a loser in my basement any time.

[cold]

Ha ha, very funny. You'd act like an ass too, if you had a girl who was a bitch. I swear I will never hear the end of this one. Thanks for the post though, prime.

[nadia]

Originally posted by WalkaboutTigger
The following information is provided as a gag only and is not a recommended course of action for any act of revenge. Should anyone choose to use the information is doing so at their own risk and holds me harmless.

1. Do not sign anything she might give you. PERIOD.

2. Do not contact her at all unless she has something of yours that is irreplaceable.

3. Wait 2 weeks to start the mayham.

4. Call her parents house and leave a message. Inform her that she needs to go to the clinic because you found out she's given you a special little friend and you know its from her since you haven't been with anyone else for the last year. Do this repeatedly over the course of a week.

5. If you have them, e-mail nude pictures of her to her parents from an anonymous account such as hotmail or other free e-mail - do not enter any real information when signing up for this account and do not sign up for it from your place of residence - go to a library or an Internet cafe to sign up and send the e-mails. Do this approximately 2 weeks after step 5 is complete.

6. If you know where she is staying, and there is a pay phone close by, call 911 from the pay phone and report there is a girl locked in her apartment threatening to end her life with a gun. Tell them she's been real loud for the last couple of minutes but its gotten all quiet all of a sudden. Do this at about 3 a.m. - wear gloves. Do this immediately following the 2-week cooling off period.

7. On a color printer, print a California license plate full sized. Tape over her license plate. Make sure it looks like it has 2002 tags. Do this approximately 1 week after step 5.

8. Wearing gloves, loosen the 4 bolts holding the rear license plate of her car. Only 1/2 turn of the bolts should be left in place when you are finished. Portland cops live to pull people over who don't have a license plate on the rear. Do this approximately 2 weeks after step 7.

9. If you know her telephone number, print up flyers reading "Get High Legally! Instructions for making LEGAL Extacy!" and affix her phone number. Post these, at night, around the local kid hang-outs, the middle schools and high schools in the area she lives in.

10. Take out 2 cash-paid-for ads in the local newspaper. Both ads should have her address but not her telephone number. One reads "Cheap Harley Davidson motorcycle parts" and lists various regularly expensive HD parts - mention in the ad the only time they can come to look at them is a specific date between 3 p.m. and 5 p.m. The second ad reads "For Sale - select-fire M16 with underbarrel grenade launcher - several cases of ammunition and grenades available as well - cheap - moving out of state" and mention it can also be looked at the same time and place as the first ad. When the Hell's Angels and the BATF show up at the same time to the same place, the fur will fly.

I hope this provides you some ideas.

that is fucking fantastic

[Tattooz4u]

Originally posted by WalkaboutTigger
The following information is provided as a gag only and is not a recommended course of action for any act of revenge. Should anyone choose to use the information is doing so at their own risk and holds me harmless.

1. Do not sign anything she might give you. PERIOD.

2. Do not contact her at all unless she has something of yours that is irreplaceable.

3. Wait 2 weeks to start the mayham.

4. Call her parents house and leave a message. Inform her that she needs to go to the clinic because you found out she's given you a special little friend and you know its from her since you haven't been with anyone else for the last year. Do this repeatedly over the course of a week.

5. If you have them, e-mail nude pictures of her to her parents from an anonymous account such as hotmail or other free e-mail - do not enter any real information when signing up for this account and do not sign up for it from your place of residence - go to a library or an Internet cafe to sign up and send the e-mails. Do this approximately 2 weeks after step 5 is complete.

6. If you know where she is staying, and there is a pay phone close by, call 911 from the pay phone and report there is a girl locked in her apartment threatening to end her life with a gun. Tell them she's been real loud for the last couple of minutes but its gotten all quiet all of a sudden. Do this at about 3 a.m. - wear gloves. Do this immediately following the 2-week cooling off period.

7. On a color printer, print a California license plate full sized. Tape over her license plate. Make sure it looks like it has 2002 tags. Do this approximately 1 week after step 5.

8. Wearing gloves, loosen the 4 bolts holding the rear license plate of her car. Only 1/2 turn of the bolts should be left in place when you are finished. Portland cops live to pull people over who don't have a license plate on the rear. Do this approximately 2 weeks after step 7.

9. If you know her telephone number, print up flyers reading "Get High Legally! Instructions for making LEGAL Extacy!" and affix her phone number. Post these, at night, around the local kid hang-outs, the middle schools and high schools in the area she lives in.

10. Take out 2 cash-paid-for ads in the local newspaper. Both ads should have her address but not her telephone number. One reads "Cheap Harley Davidson motorcycle parts" and lists various regularly expensive HD parts - mention in the ad the only time they can come to look at them is a specific date between 3 p.m. and 5 p.m. The second ad reads "For Sale - select-fire M16 with underbarrel grenade launcher - several cases of ammunition and grenades available as well - cheap - moving out of state" and mention it can also be looked at the same time and place as the first ad. When the Hell's Angels and the BATF show up at the same time to the same place, the fur will fly.

I hope this provides you some ideas.

To go along with this great post, even though it is severely late, you could always put her personal information on BBS boards, forums like this one, or even on websites. Have any x-rated pics of her? Post them to a bunch of amateur/voyeur porn sites. Give out her e-mail address if she has one, her phone number, address, etc.. on websites like hektik! Let the fun begin then.

[kenny]

Originally posted by Tattooz4u
Give out her e-mail address if she has one, her phone number, address, etc.. on websites like hektik! Let the fun begin then.

This is why people always think we're assholes. Oh well.

[cold]

Originally posted by Tattooz4u
Have any x-rated pics of her? Post them to a bunch of amateur/voyeur porn sites.

Then it'll take her 0.025 seconds to realize who took those pictures, when a friend finds them, and tells her. Also... NO i am not stupid enough to post personal shit on this site. I've been coming here for like 6 or 7 years, and I'm not about to fuck that up. Especially when I've just started posting.

Originally posted by kenny
This is why people always think we're assholes. Oh well.

Hey man. Your right. It takes only one dumbass, to do something stupid and affiliate themselves with the hektik crew to fuck things up. Now, I'm not saying I'm tight with the whole 801 crew, etc. I'm just speculating. Eh, fuck it. I'm going off on a tangent again. Dammit.

[o6]

Originally posted by cold
Then it'll take her 0.025 seconds to realize who took those pictures, when a friend finds them, and tells her.

Exactly why you should give them to her parents. My friend did this. An old flame was talking shit and spreading lies about him. So he sneaks into her dads office and plants spread eagle photos of her in his magazine. Once her dad found the photos my friend never heard from her again, nor did he hear of her talking shit ever again.

[cold]

That makes me wish I kept those photos for insurance. I'm also glad I never heard from the bitch again anyways. She ended up moving to an adjacent state eastward, and I have never heard from her again. Although I do still know all of her usernames and paswds heh... heh... Nah I won't.