A long as lunch time rant.

[kenny]

I remember my half brother throwing boiling water on me, I remember my dad beating the fuck out of mom. I remember her falling down from taking the force of bare knuckles. I remember blowing a big pile of powder out of my brother’s tray, later to find out it was coke. I remember getting thrown through a window from my drunken step mom. I remember taking money from my grandma because she was to senile to notice. I remember collecting hustler magazine in first grade and selling the pages to other kids in my class for $5.oo a pop. I remember taking the phone off the hook, and telling my Vietnam vet uncle that we were hired to kill him, and when he would pick up the phone to call the police we’d tell him that he was too late – the phone lines have been cut. Nothing is more entertaining than seeing someone you loath hop down the street on a walker. I remember burying jelly fish on the beach, and sprinkling just a little sand on them. Then we’d sit back and wait for people to step on them. That was life, which is how I grew up. Everything was solved with violence. I am not telling you this in attempt to look “cool”, I am letting you know that I look back and I can see why my life was so chaotic. Could I trust family? No, I trusted friends. Friends were always there, friends were the ones that came through when family didn’t. To answer your question yes my friends mean a lot to me, do they mean more to me than you? That is a question you can answer yourself. Are you being my friend?

Why has every girl I have dated and/or hooked up with act so god damn jealous. Seriously they need to step back and examine me. I am a fat fuck that is insolent and quite the pervert. I am in no way a prize package and I never stray. How far does this get me? Nowhere, I get accused of jerking off all the time, but I prefer to fuck… It just feels better. I get accused of watching porn when I haven’t been watching it. Do I watch it, sure I do. I like to watch porn. Is this a secret? No, you don’t like it so I don’t watch it around you. I don’t try to make it seem secretive. I just don’t want to hear you talk shit like you do about my friends all the time. They were around before you and will more than likely be around after.

Christ girls are fucked up, they always dwell on shit. They hold shit in for six or seven months. Then they blow the fuck up and what makes it even better is that you never remember it.

Here is the deal, I never put much thought into some of the shit I say - I just say it. Life is too short to give a fuck; it’s too short to sit around wondering what if. Can you say you have done what you have wanted to do? Can you say you have no regrets? I can, and I do. Hell if I do something stupid, like writing this rant, oh well. It felt good at the time. No need to cry over spilt milk.

Will I ever change? I don’t think this is possible. Thanks for stopping in, I will have your total at the window.

[Manic Velocity]

Goddamn Kenny, you rock. No qualms about who you are or any worries about what others think of you. I respect that.

Fuck those who don't like the XMission logo. They can all grab their ankles and take a baseball bat sideways. You do your own thing and have, as you said, no regrets.

I was having a pretty shitty day until I read this. Thanks Kenny.

I cant say i disagree with anything you said. Except the jelly fish thing. My feet still hurt.

Friends are family you choose.

[blood_rose]

Girls are fucked up, the one right next tome just farted a smelly one.

[veruus]

Originally posted by kenny
Life is too short to give a fuck; it’s too short to sit around wondering what if. Can you say you have done what you have wanted to do? Can you say you have no regrets? I can, and I do. Hell if I do something stupid, like writing this rant, oh well. It felt good at the time. No need to cry over spilt milk.

Think of this next time...
You see that guy/girl you've always wanted to talk to.
You are choking back a comment at work because you'd rather just blend into the background and not make trouble.
You have a chance to take a trip around/outside the country.
You are up for promotion at work but don't want to step on anyone's toes who may be up for it too.

Take chances. That's why they're there. You can get another job (if you're worth a shit in the first place). Don't walk on eggshells around people. Take life by the balls and make it yours.

[cchris_47]

nice writing kenny. i really enjoy stopping by.

[HaZard0u5]

Nice rant kenny.

[Null]

I totally see where you are coming from with the ranting, I get in trouble all of the time because of the stuff I write on Cold Milk but what are you going to do? I just suppose that if someone gets pissed off from reading something I wrote, they shouldn't have been there in the first place.
I feel the pain from the family thing also. my childhood was pretty crazy as well and I find myself hanging with friends more than family. I don't remember my brother having coke in the house though.