deep thoughts

[serial_]

I think a lot, it's about the only thing I do, and there's lots of things to think about, hell you can even think about not thinking, there you go now. Well with this whole plethora of wars going on, wars on everything from terror to drugs to our precious pr0n, well I've come to a solution on at least one of them.

The war in Iraq.

We should let gamers run the war. Gamers have a take no shit and give no reason type of attitude. The problem isn't radical governments or insurgent warfare, it's a giant blubbering political vagina flapping it's ulterior motive ridden labia all over the fucking place. War is basically a video game, just more people cry when the final score pops up in your face, it's basically RTS except better graphics, there's one big commander dude telling everyone what to do. So drop a gamer in the chair and watch as he flies up the tech tree sending in the nuke squad to blow the living fuck out of the supply lines.

And Iraq shouldn't even be a "war" imo, or even a threat. You wanna know who is a threat? I'll tell you: Korea is a threat. Have you ever seen those guys!? Busting in there with fucking 350 APM rushing you with DTs 3 minutes in and you're like "wtf i'm only on my third drone!" instead of trying to sneak up behind you and cannon rush you like those noobs in iraq. Seriously, Korea could potentially own us if we're not being totally pro. Throw some heavy FPSers on the front lines and watch them own it up with the headshot madness, and bitches with turbans would be trying to get them booted for 'spl0iting.

Life's a lot simpler through the eyes of a gamer. If you want to win, aim for the head. If you want to own, mass nukes and then watch their last building burn to the ground instead of finishing it off. And if you really want to humiliate some bitch, then you gotta knife'em!

And while we're at it shoot some media. Friendly fire exists for a reason. I'm so fucking sick of hearing about how many people died today. When you have time to actually go over their life stories then it's not a losing war. When you have to scroll the names up the screen faster than an Oxygen channel special then it's a war, and we might need to think about it. When more people die every day in Chicago than Iraq, please for god's sake stfu. I'd rather know about Lindsay Lohan's upcoming breast augmentation than listen to this regurgitated bullshit. I don't wanna see milestone death tallies in losses, who the fuck cares about the death count? Start showing me our kill count. We always know how many times someone on our side got fragged, but I wanna see how we're stacking! Gamers in the cabinet would definitely help smooth some shit over, let's throw a few FPSers into the media too, just to give us a more rounded approach, those FPS fuckers always wanna know every stat, head shots/leg/body/arm/groin shots, everything!

I wanna see some ownage when I turn on CNN, not that basket fucked bitch with the mouth looks like she had a stroke telling you about Dick Cheney's daughter at the Palm. More headshots, less talky talky. Please!

- serial_

[cold]

and when the troops over seas get up in the morning... "Awe, man.. not this map again!!!" =P