To Do List

[aadil]

- Complete class assigments before the end of next month - a couple of advanced Java and VB.Net coding exercises that require more mathematical thinking than writing code actually. Java is available for free for Linux whereas Visual Studio selling price gets a disapproving nod and a flipping finger from the debt-crippled student that I am.
What would the Master have done?

- Start monologuing on how brilliantly I fucked up last week's job interview. Perhaps I should have taken some medecine before facing the panel - like a finger of the cheapest Label with that delicious vanilla milkshake - to combat the paralysing nervousness. Atleast I got to meet some really pleasant, dedicated and cool (I was the only one formally dressed there) people, and had the privilege of attending my first ever videoconference - during my first ever job interview too. Woohoo! Let the experience of this event be wisely dwelt upon and the outcome used wisely to avoid the same career mistakes in the future, reassures my brain. STFU; I need to pee real bad, retorts my bladder.

- Pimp ma kebab-powered ride! This means consulting an ophthalmologist (I see transparent ripples and cell-like clusters when I stare too long at distant objects), the friendly chiropractor (for treating that dislocated weak right arm and back pains) and the dreaded dentist (Wisdom Willy strikes back). Somedays, it's easier to buy a coffin and lie in it.

- Stretching: still room for improving that full side leg split (those sealed and buried Jane Fonda's videos might come in handy). Plus I need some urgent dedication to practice my karate movements (grasshoppa style) at home - it's been two weeks since I last kissed the soft welcoming dojo mat.

- Breathe!!! (most important)

[Teep]

Originally Posted by aadil

I see transparent ripples and cell-like clusters when I stare too long at distant objects

As long as the cell-like clusters don't tell you to do barbara streisand imitations you're cool

[aadil]

No but I keep hearing Triumph the insult dog's voice who keep telling me to poop on everyone.

[idbeholda]

Originally Posted by aadil

No but I keep hearing Triumph the insult dog's voice who keep telling me to poop on everyone.

If I had the ability to do that, I would. People would walk by, as I would cleverly hide myself in a tree. When The Critical Moment arrives, they find themselves starting at a largely misshapen Yultide Log from above.

[aadil]

It's easy, you will need to listen to Triumph's album 24/7. The voice will start to appear after the 30th replay or so. I think its subliminal poop messages have something to do with it.

I keed, I keed. ;D